Explains Himself

by Marco Aziel

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1.
01:46
2.
01:00
3.
4.
02:19
5.
00:54
6.
7.
8.
01:21
9.
10.
03:21
11.
12.
02:34
13.
03:14
14.
02:07

about

This album was written between 2/1 and 2/24 for February Album Writing Month 2017. It's entirely self produced and was recorded over a series of 3 consecutive all-nighters.

I think it's pretty neat. I hope you like it.

credits

released March 10, 2017

Bass on track 2 by Travis Anderson of Daddy and the Long Legs
Additional vocals on track 4 by Chase Macinski of Dogleg
Electric guitar on tracks 10 and 11 by Kyle McFarland of Swordfish
Electric guitar on track 13 by Angelo Chavez of Welman
Gang vocals (and claps) by people I love, among them Connor Azure and John Bonacorsi of Makeshift Planet

Recorded by Marco Aziel and Travis Anderson
Mixed and mastered by Marco Aziel

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Marco Aziel Ypsilanti, Michigan

The introspective indie/punk solo project of that guy in Daddy and the Long Legs. Wanna get in touch? info at marcoaziel dot com

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Track Name: Disassemble
The truth is that truth is useless
It's not as tangible as fact
Not so simple and dramatic
So let's compare and contrast the truth with the facts
Until it's too hard to understand love or empathize with anybody because
It's all algebra to me
Compelled by a tendency to disassemble everything

And now that it's over
I can say that I called it
Predict that you'll fuck up
You can claim you're a prophet
I feel like a dick now
For writing these words down
For having these feelings
Still fucking the new girl

But I still think about you whenever I'm alone
Now this house feels haunted when nobody's home
And I suspect you know the feeling
Hardly ever sleeping
Staring at the ceiling in my room
I miss you when I drink but I miss you when I'm sober
Miss you in my sleep and I miss you hung over
And I miss you every day
I miss you every night
Yeah I miss you when I listen to Allison Weiss
I think about you all the fucking time
Track Name: Sweet Tooth
I don't believe in ones and onlys
Or toxic fairy tale love stories
They're all unhealthy and they fuckin bore me so
So I don't
I don't wanna read the words "Be Mine"
I ain't your valentine
Those candy hearts inscribed serve as a sharp reminder
That as much as I'd like to
I could never satisfy your sweet tooth
Track Name: Celebrity Magic
Sometimes I think indecision is the only thing that's keepin me alive
Cuz I can't decide if I wanna kill myself or if I just wanna die
Cuz there is a difference
Yeah there is a fine line

How many times must I have this conversation?
You make me question my existence every time you keep insistin
"Baby, you'll be famous"
So what if I will?
Is celebrity magic?
Will is fill this void and break my self destructive habits?
Track Name: Guest Check
Wrote this song on a guest check at work
As you walk in through the door on my first night shift in months
I guess I was just unprepared
When you pass by the cash register
We trade glances hardly sayin a word
But your look that split second the blacks of our eyes meet could rip me in half where I stand it reminds me
The first time I saw you
Asleep at your desk
Should've woken you up
What if that's how we met?
But how fitting I didn't
I just packed up and left you
A stranger asleep at her desk

And again on the stairs at your choir recital
You call out my name and I turn and you smile
And then in my room
So scared I would bore you
You mumbled "It's fine, cuz I fucking adore you"

Could've killed me to hear you say
And if it actually did
And if that were the last thought to run through my brain before death
I wouldn't complain
Track Name: This Shit
This shit is awesome
This shit is rad
This shit is dope as hell
This shit's the best shit that I have ever had
This shit is sick
This shit is hype
This shit is twisted
This shit is tight

This shit's bananas
This shit goes hard
This shit is absolutely batshit crazy
This shit is off the charts
This shit is fat
This shit is way huge
This shit is massive
This shit is fuckin schley, dude
Track Name: Party Song No. 1
Don't wanna ruin your night
But by now you know it was a big mistake to invite me over
Cuz I can't get a grip
I don't have the traction
Some nights any sort of social interaction could spin me out

I wish I knew how to calm the fuck down without attracting such attention to myself and bummin everyone out
I know that I should just leave
But if I went home now I probly couldn't sleep and I don't wanna be alone

I don't wanna be alone

So let's just try to relax
Take a pull on the Jack
Inhibitions are funny, sometimes they fight back
It's a downward spiral
A bird's eye view toilet
A party with best friends, why can't I enjoy it?
Track Name: Party Song No. 2
I told myself tonight before I left that this was it
I'll get made up n slap on a smile and this time it's gonna stick
I will be bursting with charisma
I'm the life of the party
I'm the person everybody wants to hang around

Oh what a joke!
I am so sorry if I forget your name
You see I'm chronically incapable of retaining anything
Because I'm constantly inventing stupid conflicts in my head
'Til I'm too stressed out to focus on a single word you said
And now I'm frozen up
It's like my mouth's sewn shut be the inertia
The inertia of the situation
I'm fuckin spacin
I'm spacin out

I'm spacin out
Track Name: Straight Up
I gotta be straight up
Either I don't feel love or my idea of it is pretty sick
And jealousy doesn't make sense to me
But as friends I think we kinda click
So you do you
And I'll do me
I don't need a proper lover
But I think you're cute
Yeah I think you're sweet
And maybe we could do each other
Track Name: I Hate Society
We all got weaknesses
And we all got strengths
We all got things to cope with
And we got ways to cope with them
And I hate society
I hate every little thing about it

I hate money
And you might say that without it there would be no more guitars to play
And now punk shows
Well we wouldn't need this
It's just how we deal with civilization
And I'd trade it in an instant if undeserving people would stop acting like they earned all of the power that they wield

Oh and I hate wall street
I hate the advertising industry
I hate media companies
But more that anything I hate myself for bein complacent
I'm just complainin
as if that's gonna change this
Track Name: Work Clothes
There's no such thing as a fresh start or a clean break
When your friends all say that you've changed
They don't know you
They don't know that you have always been this way

So hold onto the people who believe you aren't insane like your life depends on it
Cuz it does

Haunted by the feeling there's a right way to do things
And it will elude me forever
If it ain't perfect then it ain't worth it
There's gotta be something that's better

I'm still wearin my work clothes
Confusing my roommates
Haven't been home in a few days
This is practice for the asskick that I know is coming my way
Track Name: Do U Wanna Talk About It?
This story is classic
It is textbook fear of attachment after a breakup
Follow the trend that I'll drift away from my closest friends and they'll think I hate them
So my dearest, I think of you often and fondly
I swear I would call you but there's something that stops me
It's irrational I know
Every time I pick up the phone
I'll think that you've got better things to do than hang with me so I'll leave you alone

And I wanna claw my watering eyes out every time I open my mouth
Just to choke on the words as they reverse back through my throat
Return to the black hole in my head where they'll echo
It's relentless
They will circle like sharks
When I cry there's no catharsis
And the waves I expected to rock me to sleep escalate
They turn against me
I'm confessing my fragility
I've been floating on the surface
Where it hurts less
Where it's easy to ignore my own contents
But I can't contain this anymore

I can't contain this anymore
Track Name: Flake Out
If you love me tell me now
Let me dispel any illusion you may have that I am different and that I won't let you down
Cuz I will

Yeah I will

I will flake out
I will break your heart if you let me
I will sabotage every good thing
It is damn near systematic how I replaced my few good habits with a multitude of bad ones

And I'll wallow in self pity
On every car ride
And I will stress eat
And I'll just get high when I'm unhappy
And never ask why it isn't helping

I made a list of all the things I wanna fix about myself
It's pretty long
Cuz most of what people call prayers now were first written as songs
So I'll repeat it 'til I believe it
'Til I forgive myself for all that I've done wrong
I'm investing time and effort into making my life better
Track Name: Minivan
You poke your head through the sunroof
So you can watch the sunset
I'll admit there are moments that make everything worth it
But it makes me suspicious that my brain isn't workin
Like when I'm happy it could only mean I'm forgettin somethin

And the thing I think that makes it magic is the simple fact that we didn't plan it
I don't ever wanna forget this
We got music, we got gas
And I'll bet this minivan could function pretty well as a bunkbed
So before I second guess this
Would someone please just look up the directions

Wear this blanket like a cape
It is such a beautiful thing to feel like a total dumbass
And not hate yourself for it for once
Can you see this?
If we just lie here
Focus on one star, the whole sky will disappear
I've never seen em quite as bright as they are now
Each one of a kind
Yeah they're brilliant and dying

Melt my brain down
Let the molecules rearrange themselves
It don't matter if it won't last
Just let me have this
Track Name: MDRICWSHAC
Medium dark roast iced coffee with sweet hazelnut and cream